Breaking the Trauma-Bond

Breaking the Trauma-Bond Between Your Patient and Their Family

Friday 18 September 2020 - A Live Webinar

An Object Relations Approach to Resistance in Treatment - Led by Dr David Celani - Chaired by Alice Waterfall

  • Includes a recording of the event with access for a year (14 days post the event)
  • Bookings close at 9.00am BST Tuesday 15 September

This workshop will address one of the most frustrating and often repeated events in a psychotherapist’s daily practice, when a client, who seems to be making progress, suddenly begins to aggressively defend his family of origin and angrily abandons treatment. This sudden resistance to therapy is provoked when the patient realises that s/he is pulling away from their family of origin, both internal and external, and cannot imagine surviving alone.




Dr David Celani,


12:00 BST (07.00 EDT)
The Extreme Dependency of the Child on Mother and the Consequences of Rejection
Fairbairn was one of the first analytic writers to recognise the devastating impact that maternal rejection has on the development of the child’s personality. He explained how the child’s absolute dependency on their mother makes rejection of their needs a traumatic event. The emotionally deprived child cannot continue to develop and explore the world because they would have to draw their attention away from their mother to whom they cling in the hope of love and protection that might be forthcoming. All other developmental tasks are thus put on hold, and they begin to fall behind their peers.

13:00 Break

The Development of the Unconscious, the Emergence of Sub-Egos, and the Hidden Attachments that Prevent Separation from Bad Objects
This session will focus on dissociated internalisations of the toxic relational events that repeatedly occurred in the child’s life.  We will explore how such dissociated memories in relation to the rejecting parent create a sub-self that relates to memories of the rejecting parent in the child’s unconscious. A second pair of unconscious structures develop within the inner world that are designed to keep the child’s hope alive in the most rejecting and abusive families. This second split-off view of self and object is developed from the fantasy that the parent contains an untapped storehouse of love. This view of the parent gives the child hope for the future and this libidinal sub self is ferociously invested in discovering the path to this hidden love.

14.30 Break

A Fairbairnian Approach to Change:  Minimising Patient Resistance, While Maximising the Therapist’s  “Introjectability”
This section of the presentation will focus on identifying and responding to the split-off structures that will emerge during the treatment process. We will also examine the process of developing a clinical narrative that subtly focuses on early relational failures. Premature discussion of the many failures that the patient experienced can produce resistance, as the patient cannot yet accept them because they further separate him from his attachment objects. We will look at a clinical narrative is designed to help the central ego to grow, and to get used to relating to an external object that operates as a new and good object. Over time, the patient’s increasingly strong central ego will allow them to face the painful, neglectful and abandoning reality of childhood that has heretofore been successfully dissociated.

15.30 Break

Understanding and Tolerating Patient Resistance, and Repetition Compulsions
Fairbairn’s model is a powerful explanatory tool that sees resistance as a clinging to unconscious relationships in the unconscious structures. We will see how repetition compulsions are the acting-out of internalised relationships with new external objects (including the therapist) and how these offer a window of understanding to the patient’s unconscious. The calm and matter-of-fact discussions between the therapist as the good object and the patient’s central ego can accumulate in the patient’s central ego. In time, they can surpass the intense attachments between the split-off structures that have guided the patient’s life into repeated futile patterns. Typical clinical narratives between patient and therapist will be modelled to illustrate the surprising potency of this approach.

17.00 End


Handouts included:

Bookings close at 9.00am BST Tuesday 15 September

Confer member:
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Certificates of attendance for 5 hours will be provided


This is a live online webinar using Zoom software. Zoom is free to download and use.

For more information about Zoom click here.

To download Zoom free of charge click here.


12:00 BST (07.00 EDT) Start
13:00 Break
13:30 Continue
14.30 Break
15.00 Continue
15.30 Break
16.00 Continue
17.00 End


Regrettably, refunds cannot be given in any circumstances except as follows:

  • You cancel in writing to 60 days before the first date of the event you have booked, in which case you will be entitled to a 100% refund.
  • You cancel in writing to 30 days before the first date of the event you have booked, in which case you will be entitled to a 50% refund.

This does not apply to parts of an event such as a seminar within a series but only to a whole event or complete series. You may give your place to another person if you let us know that person's name at least 24 hours before the event begins.

We reserve the right to change a speaker at one of our conferences without offering a refund. However, if a solo presenter cancels we will offer a full refund OR transfer of your fee to another Confer event. If the entire event is cancelled we will offer you a full refund.

We reserve the right to change our prices at any time. Regrettably, discounts offered after you made your booking cannot be claimed or applied retrospectively.